Dear 21 Year Old Me,
I wrote the first draft of this on the flight to Vegas, but I forgot to finish it and it was on a diff. laptop. So I will start over. And it took me a month and a half to write this, so technically I am the 21-year-old talking to my 21-year-old self. I apologize, but it has indeed been quite a crazy year.
Where do I even start? I guess we should pick up from where we left off, November 2023. You were knees deep in the first semester in Berkeley, gaslighting yourself into thinking everything is okay. being 20 actually turned a whole new page for me, life-wise, career-wise, and on a personal level.
I can feel myself getting more practical and practical. Bending for capitalism. Bending to reality. Well, it is about damn time anyways, after all, you signed your full-time offer. You used to be so angry at the whole world. Angry about wars, capitalism, politics, etc… but at some point, you learn to live with it. And you begin to feel helpless instead of being angry. Because most things are beyond your control. You turned your anger into frustration, and frustration turns into helplessness.
I told myself to follow through my goals last year. I think I somewhat got out of my comfort zone and worked harder on my discipline and goals: for example, I actually consistently went to the gym.
I have a simple goal for you this year: live in the moment. How dare you call yourself an ENFP when all you do is worry about your next move?
Also, while I’m at it, you also haven’t written much this year, after your creative writing course. Please, contain your media consumption and do things that fulfill you instead of draining you.